It is June 1st, which means that I have completed month 1 of my personal "happiness project." How did May go? To be honest, I was hoping that I would have accomplished more. I didn't really lose any weight and I found it harder to stick to my resolutions than I expected. The no sugar thing did not last long, although I will say that I am finding it easier to not eat it every day. Eating out only once a week and getting salads otherwise would have worked, except that we went to Arizona for a weekend and ate fast food almost every day because we were traveling. Whooops. I think I worked out 4 times a week for two weeks, and 3 times a week for two weeks. So, not excellent but not terrible. However, I did do great at eating at least 7 servings of fruit and vegetables a day. I think I reached this goal all but a handful of days. Apparently I am good at meeting goals that require eating, rather than abstaining.
While at times I have felt discouraged, one of the quotes that really resonated with me from Gretchen Rubin's book was (in summary) that resolutions are something to aspire to, as opposed to goals, which are met and struck off a list. You have to keep resolutions daily; you don't finish them. So while I wasn't perfect in keeping my resolutions, all is not lost. While they are not my focus for this month, I will continue to try and stick with them.
This month, I had planned to focus on Marriage. I figured I should tackle some of the more important areas of my life first. However, today as I was praying at the end of my fast, I felt strongly impressed that I should focus on Peace instead of Marriage this month.
It has been a crazy month. It has been a crazy life these past few months with work, and I have really struggled with balancing everything. Everything has been weighing heavier than usual lately, and I have had to really consider whether working is the right thing for our family. The short answer is that I believe it still is, but that doesn't solve the problem of the toll it is taking on me and my family. Since at the moment it seems our situation will not be changing, I feel like I need to do some work to change myself so that I can deal with the loads I carry more effectively.
My list for "Peace" is a bit longer than my list for "Health" was. In addition to resolutions, I have some projects I would like to accomplish in this area. Because I wasn't considering this topic until today, my thoughts are not as organized as they were before, so I might be making some changes, but as of right now, here are my thoughts on resolutions for Peace:
:: Journal daily -- this helps me clear out my mind so much. Writing has fallen to the bottom of my list for the last few months and I think renewing it will really give me an outlet and a stronger sense of serenity.
:: Meditate daily -- in residency we were given meditation classes by a Zen priestess of Buddhism. It was an amazing experience. I have always been interested in meditation but find it difficult to make the time for it, even though when I do take five minutes I feel so much more centered and able to tackle my obligations. I'm planning on using what I've learned and meditating for five minutes a day.
:: Record my patriarchal blessing in my own voice -- kind of a weird one. I felt very strongly impressed to do this, maybe because I often feel like reading it is another task that weighs on me, but listening will be easier.
:: Go to the temple -- I haven't made it to the temple in a while. With the time spent away from Cal for work, I feel guilty for any time I spend away from him. And sometimes I too jealously guard my time after he goes to sleep. I need to make it a priority to go.
:: Search for quotes, songs, scriptures, etc. that promote peace -- Reading is definitely one of the main ways that I learn and grow. I feel like any time I want to work on an area of my life, I read a book about it. I want to spend some time in the scriptures learning specifically about peace, as well as finding conference talks, books, etc.
What do you find promotes peace for you? I am definitely looking for more ideas and insights!